As you prepare to become a parent, you innately want to work hard to do all the things you can to make the world a better place for your child or children.  As you prepare to become a parent when your children have a story, a full history, and through different circumstances, you not only strive to educate yourself and then educate others, but you MUST educate yourself and then educate others–or at least that’s what you should do.  What I’ve learned as I’ve been “preparing to become a parent”, but should really just be applicable to life in general, is that the time is ALWAYS right to be offended and to call out injustice when we see it–be it injustice surrounding race, sexuality, sexism, ableism, etc.

Over the past few years as I increased my awareness, checked my own privilege, examined my biases, and reflected on the lenses in which I see the world, I became angry–at myself, at history, at society, at the present.  It was as if I was seeing the world through an entirely different set of glasses. I woke up out of the fog of my own privilege, out of my whiteness…and began to see. Now don’t get me wrong, I still step into that fog from time to time, but I try damn hard to get right out of it.  

And then I learned some more.  I continued to educate myself. I asked questions.  And I worked really hard to listen (You know that can be hard for me.  I’m working on it; I promise).

I’m still learning.  I’m still educating myself.  I’m still asking questions. And I’m still working on listening.

I’ve been working hard to be an ally.  Someone who will speak up. Who will be offended.  Who will call out injustice. I tried to really utilize my grit and my grace.  My grit gave me the courage to try to speak out even though my voice wavered…I’m still working on speaking up and speaking out.  And my grace is giving me the opportunity to educate firmly, but gently.  

Does any of this make me a saint? A white savior?  Someone special? Committed? No frickin’ way. It makes me a person who is doing exactly what I should have been doing my entire life.  I was always against racism, discrimination, etc. But I wouldn’t have called myself anti-racist. I wouldn’t have said that I was actively and consciously trying to be an ally.  

As a white woman of privilege, I know that it is MY responsibility to educate myself.  People of color, diverse abilities, different sexual orientations, etc. do not owe me anything.  The information is out there. It’s been out there. It’s time to learn, listen, and reflect. But more importantly to do something, to be an ally.  

So I guess what I’m trying to say is that you’ll be hearing me bring up equality vs. equity a lot.  You may think I talk about race too much. I’ll be throwing out ideas on ways to make my classroom, my environment more inclusive.  I’ll be sharing book titles, and calling out injustices. I will be doing everything in my power to be anti-racist and to be an ally.

Sure, I’ll mess up.  

Yes, I’ll clam up when I should be calling something out.  

I’ll get it wrong and be embarrassed.

I will definitely have to apologize.

But everyday I’m making a commitment to shut up, listen and learn from the experiences of those who are different than myself, and to try again.  It’s too important not to.

~Chelsea