Ever feel that life has you floating in some freezing cold water like a giant chunk of ice.  Well, I have.  I mean…ah…do, yeah that’s it.  That’s how I feel.  As I stare out at Lake Superior, I can’t help but think of myself as one of those ice chunks and life is taking me in whatever direction it wants to right now; just like Superior has it’s way with the ice. 

I find myself once again on the shores of Lake Superior in Duluth, Minnesota.

I love vacations. This one is no exception.  It came up way faster than either of us anticipated. Well, me more than Chelsea, I tend to be notoriously non-committal with where to travel.  Not with taking the vacation and getting up and going, but more so on where to go.  

One area that I would love to travel to that we have never been is northern California…wow, it looks gorgeous.  I had the desire to go somewhere far away, pick up and go, fly someplace different. I like trying new things, going places that I’ve never been before and staying busy.  Even on vacation.  

We ended up in Duluth, Minnesota…a small city that I’ve been to at least a dozen times.  And it’s just what I need.  (more on that later)

You see at first we were thinking about heading to New Mexico.  Adoption and vacation related.  But…we decided not to.  Adoption is complicated.  We are quickly learning that adoption is a series of facts, feelings and straight information that we have to gather, input into a formula that doesn’t exist and make the best decision for our family.  Seriously, it’s hard to make a decision on some of this stuff.  We have seen a lot of paperwork…that’s great but it’s still hard to make a decision on people’s lives based on a bunch of pieces of paper.  Ever misinterpret an email and read into something that was actually nothing? That times a billion.  There are multiple times per day that we are 100% sure we are going one way, only to turn 180 degrees, and then back to the original later that night.  That’s not because of us, or any type of indecision, that’s because adoption is Simplex. There are more moving parts, feelings, decisions, and information involved than one who hasn’t experienced it can imagine. 

So here we are in Duluth, MN.  Why Duluth you may ask?  Exactly, Duluth, I would respond.  It’s exactly Duluth that we need right now.  

There is no place as comfortable to “get-away” as Duluth, Minnesota.  It’s a whole different world next to the Big Lake.  It’s a small town feel, city feel, door county and a short drive to solitude all rolled into one.  I’ve been here at least a dozen times and that helps make it comfortable. Like coming home but getting away. 

There’s a connection with nature here.  I need that. Shoot, we all need that.  There is nothing like immersing yourself and surrounding yourself with the power, wonder, and beauty of nature when things aren’t exactly going your way. 

 

It’s the perfect place to spend some time with your own thoughts.  There’s a lot of introspection with adoption.  It needs to happen in a powerful way.  I needed to re-focus, and take a long look at myself, my thoughts and my journey again.  What’s right? What’s not?  Why? Can I do this?  Can we do this?  Should we do this or that? It’s a lot.  (Don’t interpret this as second-guessing, just deciding on different options—remember the Benefits of Doubt?) But it will make us better adoptive parents, I’ll tell you that.

Oh and by the way they have world-class beer!  That’s also why. 

So when you are feeling like a giant chunk of ice and Lake Superior is having it’s way with you–get away. Find someplace comfortable, bury yourself in nature, meditate, and find some great beer.  Because you know eventually the ice melts, the solid turns liquid and you end up as something else all together.      

~Eli