People say that a picture is worth a thousand words. Man, this picture is pretty crazy, right? What emotions or thoughts does it evoke out of you?

Aww, I feel so bad for them.

Why can’t they just have a baby?

Maybe when they adopt they’ll get pregnant.

Yay! This is so cool! 

I can’t wait to sleep in Eli and Chelsea’s guest bedroom and relive my glory days in bunk beds! 

You know the saying, “You know what A-S-S-U-M-E-ing does?” Well there’s a reason for that statement. It gets easy, even for me, in adoption to assume how hopeful adoptive parents, first parents, and adoptees feel about adoption. The interesting thing is it’s like anything in life. It’s different for different people, so best idea–ask!

What I can tell you is this…when I look at these pictures it makes me so happy and a little sad all at the same time, but not probably for the reasons you think. It makes me happy because I know that’s exactly how that room should look now. I love it. It makes me happy because I had so many people love Eli and I enough to allow us the opportunity to oogle and ahh over cutesy baby stuff. It makes me a little bit sad because I know that some of my happiness will be due to my future children’s loss, as well as their first family’s loss.

I think it gets easy to assume, as supportive family and friends, that Eli and I are in a super tough spot. I think it gets easy to assume that we really want or hope for a biological child. I think it gets easy to assume that this way of building our family is just too hard or too long. I think it gets easy to assume that Eli and I haven’t thought about, educated ourselves, prayed about as many aspects of our decisions as possible. Let me reassure you on a few things:

• We are not, will not, are not planning or wanting, to be quite frank, to have biological children. This is by choice. OUR choice. Not because we can’t. We made this choice a while ago, and are not only happy with our choice, but know that we are people who are choosing to adopt to build our family.
• Yes, the road is a little tough, but please don’t feel sorry for us. Isn’t labor tough? Isn’t adding to a family tough? Isn’t life at times a little tough? But it’s beautiful, right? The bumps are what make the trip memorable.
• Time is amazing. We as humans always want things right now. But guess what? That’s not always what is best. This time, reflection, etc. has offered us an opportunity to really listen and feel where we are supposed to be. So although some may feel bad for us, we are feeling quite content at what we are pursuing and where we are right now.

We love and appreciate you all. But rest assured, we knew this road would be long. We will take all of the prayers, well wishes, questions, and love that we can get. So, whether it be a crib and cutesy baby clothes or a good ole’ fashioned set of bunk beds, we are going to be fine, just trust us when we say it.

~Chelsea